Genuine Peace (Part II) Sermon SHORT

“Genuine Peace” – Part II
June 1, 2008

Genuine peace involves:

I. Full Forgiveness
Last week, we looked at this first critical piece in the puzzle of genuine peace: we must forgive as Christ has forgiven us.

II. Seeking the Welfare of the Other Party
Philippians 2:1-4
Paul is addressing people here who are under the potential of attack from a hostile world, as well as being under attack from disunity within. Paul says, at the end of chapter 1, that in light of the likelihood of persecution, they need to
• Be united (reiterated in 2:2)
• Be striving for the same goal, that of the gospel, and
• Be courageous

And then, in chapter 2, after laying the groundwork of the unity we have with God in Christ, he puts some very practical meat on those bones:

A. Approach – “do nothing from rivalry”
Competition produces winners and losers. And while that might be fun in some situations, it’s not so much fun, nor is it particularly productive, when we are in a conflict situation. We need to approach a conflict situation as through cooperative negotiation instead of competition. Cooperative negotiation seeks constructive solutions that are beneficial to each party.

B. Assessment – “or conceit”
The first attitude of the peacemaker is toward himself: humility. Paul echoes Jesus is saying that the problem isn’t that we think too little of ourselves, but that we think too much!

C. Attitude – “he is more significant than me”
This follows naturally on the heels of true humility; I consider the other person to be more worthy than myself. We have to look to the example of Christ to see how this plays out—and fortunately, Paul puts it in black-and-white for us right there in verses 5-11.

D. Actions – “seek the other’s best”
I will not stop with an attitude, however noble that attitude might be, but I will also act in ways that seek the real good of the other person.

Now let me give you some practical ideas about how to seek the welfare of the other person in a conflict situation, where my goal is cooperation and negotiation rather than competition. The acrostic is “PAUSE”; this is from Ken Sande’s book The Peacemaker.

“P A U S E”
• Prepare
Do they not go astray who devise evil? Those who devise good meet steadfast love and faithfulness. Proverbs 14:22

- Pray
- Get the facts
- Identify the issues/interests of both parties
- Study the Word
- Brainstorm possible options
- Anticipate reactions
- Select a good time/place to meet
- Plan your opening remarks
- Seek godly counsel

• Affirm relationships
In a conflict, there is a problem—but there is also a person. That person retains the image of God in him. That person is a person for whom Christ died. That person is worthy of respect, even if her actions are not. So I…

- Speak with respect and courtesy
- Listen, so that I can understand
- Give the benefit of the doubt
- Speak with grace, even when addressing sin on her part
- Allow face-saving
- Be generous with thanks and praise
- “As you would that men should do to you…”

• Understand interests

- An issue is a question that needs to be resolved in order to get to genuine peace - “how can the neighbors stop the dog from barking?”
- A position is a stance toward correcting the problem – “the neighbors should keep the dog inside at night”
- An interest is what motivates people – “the neighbors breed dogs for a living, and need the income”

You have interests; the other person has interests as well. Surfacing these can be helpful in dealing with the issues, and can soften entrenched positions as well.

• Search for creative solutions
What are the possible options? Brainstorm here; lay any possible option on the table. Get creative; work together; offer your help. Remember, we are cooperating together in order to find a mutually-satisfactory resolution to the problem.

• Evaluate options objectively, reasonably
What are the best avenues to resolve the issues at hand? Again remembering that we’re not about “winning”, or “protecting our turf”, but rather taking as objective an approach as possible toward the options—even if it means we experience a little pain through the process.

III. Overcoming Evil with Good
Romans 12:14-21
What do I do when the person who I’m in conflict with is an ornery sort, and not all that interested in being God-honoring in his manner of solving the problem. Uggh…what do I do? I overcome evil with good. I’m going to deal with her ill-will by returning her good for evil, and Paul gives us some practical help with how we can do that.

But notice first the context of this passage; it’s found in verses 1-2, some of the most critical verses in all of Scripture. “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind” instead of acting like the world acts, thinking like the world thinks, living as the world lives.

A. Control your tongue
Actually, it’s more than simply controlling your tongue that Paul says here; it’s more than simply refraining from leveling blasts at the individual, but it goes to the next step: “bless”. This means, literally, “to invoke God’s blessing upon” another person.

B. Commune with everyone
We are to have the kind of connection with every person, regardless of stature, that gets deep enough that we feel what that person feels, whether it be mourning or rejoicing or what-have-you. Do we hurt with that person’s hurts? Do we rejoice at his joys? Do we do all we can to live in harmony with that person, to do what verse 18 says?

C. Continue in what is right
I will not answer evil words with evil words. I will not respond to evil done to me with reciprocal evil. Vindictiveness is ruled out for the follower of Christ, and also ruled out is the right to play “judge, jury, and executioner”. “Give thought” to do what is honorable suggests that we need to plan in advance, to take careful precautions, in order that anyone watching us will eventually have to come to the honest conclusion that you’ve done right.

D. Commit “justice” to God
Here’s the promise: God is just, and God is sovereign. Further, this life is not the end of things; it’s just the beginning for us. And so putting those Scriptural truths together, we have a God Who is going to one day, in eternity future if not now, set things right, a God with the power and ability to do just that. If in our conflict we do not get the kind of just result we might wish for, we instead of lashing out or taking vengeance or initiating a lawsuit against a fellow believer must yield to God’s eternal justice.

E. Compassion trumps all else
My actions toward the other person in the conflict, if I consider him more worthy than myself, will be to seek to meet his needs before my own, to minister to him redemptively. Paul says that doing this will “heap burning coals” on the head of your enemy. In ancient times, burning coals were used as a weapon to fend off attackers. These burning coals would soon enough wear down the resolve of the most determined attacker. So loving compassion holds the strong possibility of overcoming the resistance of the most-hardened opponent, bringing him/her, with God’s help, to repentance and genuine peace.

5 Good Questions

1. Read Philippians 2:5-11. Discuss how the example of Jesus impacts your understanding of seeking the welfare of the other party in a conflict situation.
2. Why is it critical, in a conflict situation, to seek to understand the interests of the other party?
3. Think about a conflict situation which didn’t go well for you. How would applying PAUSE have potentially made a difference?
4. Discuss how “blessing” another person in a conflict situation might change the entire situation and promote resolution.
5. Read I Corinthians 6:1-8, and discuss the reasons that Paul would challenge us to give up our rights and allow ourselves to be defrauded rather than going to court with other Christians.